so its two in the morning....

I know I'm up way later than I ought to be but with classes and the role of mommy and wife to fill, I find the only free time I have to myself is seldom, usually late hours.

The upside is that with adrenal and now thyroid issues, I don't feel as exhausted as I should be, downside--I don't feel as exhausted as I should be and I stay up way too late and get sick.

Anyways, on the road to getting better from some pretty good congestion and head cold symptoms, and I'm finding I need an outlet.

And blogging is great for that. It really is. But I just can't bring myself to blog when I'm so busy. Its not like it takes that long to sign in and do a little typing. I think for me its more of a mental thing; My words are on stage and sometimes that brings more stress than necessary for a simple cathartic outlet.

I know I really over analyze too. So I'm going to pretend that the whopping 2-3 people reading my blog aren't really there, that this is like one of those anonymous online journals. (Or I could always go the tradition route and imagine you all naked, but I think we can all agree that who ever came up with that method was a bit of a pervert, and being as I am not, we won't go there. Plus, it doesn't really work for blogging. )

Random fact: I am bad. I don't keep an actual journal because I am too scared that someone is going to read it one day. Not because I have deep dark secrets, but that...I don't know. Its really weird actually. I feel like after I got married I locked a part of myself away and now I'm too scared to let her out. Doesn't make sense, but its true.

So anyways, I've been writing again. It feels good to write again. Its exciting. It frees my mind.

Speaking of my mind, I seem to be able to be more cognizant of my dreams than most people. So when I compare writing to being like a dream except your conscious mind has the steering wheel, most people probably don't know what I mean. But this is also true.

For those of you who are aware of their dreams, or are like me and wake in the morning and are disappointed not to have to wake from sleep, but to have to interrupt a dream, let me tell you--writing is more awesome than dreaming!

All right. Enough about writing, I am going to drag myself to bed.